Halloween & the Carhole of Scariness, Mk. III

Lily and Jake scored make up for Halloween from Grandpa Gene. So much for the Word Girl plan, but they had a great time. Lily exercised extreme self control by waiting until the 31st to stick on the snake tattoos - we went to two different parties before that and I'm sure she was dying to bust them out, but she held on till the big day. They're still on three days after and don't seem to be worse for wear.

Jake was Spiderman, reprising his role of two Halloween's ago, but this time he used makeup for the mask, which I think is pretty cool . While the kids costumes weren;t the most original or creative ever, they loved them, so thanks Grampa for the supplies.

We spent more energy quite honestly on the

Best...Carhole....Ever.....


Everybody got involved in the setup.

We worked overtime on the CHoS this year and tried for some tricky special effects - a Pepper's Ghost and a Bottomless Pit/Hellhole were the highpoints. Take a look at Dave and my post scare wrapup walkthrough of the CHoS below.

Here's a work in progress picture of our Pepper's Ghost: we call her Lisa.





And here's still more pics from the Lemmonds'



Best...Carhole....Ever.....till Friday (<----!!!!) October 31, 2008.

New work - name the plane....

Any guesses? I had never heard of it till Kim gifted to me.....

Email me or post a comment with the answer and you'll win something meaningless, probably just bragging rights.

OK. Maybe I will play soccer

Jake reconsiders - after he hears that his friends Keola and Alika are hitting the pitch.

Buh-bye baby seat !

 Jake is totally excited that he's gotten out of the baby seat and into a booster. Over the last few months the only way to keep him happy was to tell him that baby seats had 5 way restraints like race cars....

Jake - "I click in like a RACE CAR? OK !"

We went to Kmart and he picked out a Diego booster seat. While we don't catch much of the adventures of Diego (he's not on PBS - don't tell my kids) Jacob still has a soft spot for him since they share a name Jacob/Diego = Enlgish/Spanish in case you didn't know. Every once in a while Jake even tells us to call him Diego (which was my plan before he was born anyway...at last ! My plan is coming to fruition! BUWAHAHAHAHA!)

Now Lily tries to sit in the Diego seat. Finally Jake has something she wants, but he's cool about and actually let's her. What a guy.

Blues on the Bay

Went to the other side of the island to an air show with the most rabid plane-friends we have, the Brooks'. The kids (Jim and I) had fun and the little boys and girls had a blast as well.

Happy Anniversary Jim and Laurie!

Double thanks to moms/wives to indulging our obsession.

Stay on target......stay on target

In previous generations parents would stress about when to introduce their children to the important things in life: the birds and the bees, mortality, what really happened to dad and why he lives in that big house outside of town with the bars and all those other scary looking men.

Now, generally speaking we can leave a lot of these to the Internet (thanks YouTube!) but there comes a time in any parents life when they need to help their children make an important passage:

When to watch Star Wars for the first time?
And perhaps more importantly, which of the six movies to begin with?
How young is too young?
Can a 6 and 4 year old be expected to handle arms getting hacked off, planets full of people murdered....the whole Luke and Leia thing (shudder).....

These weighty questions were brought into sharp focus in the last couple of weeks because Jacob saw the presents that I had chosen for Jack's birthday party - a Star Wars sticker book and a Darth Vader Halloween candy bucket (super-hyper cool).



(In case you don't remember, Jack is a major SW fan as recounted here from last years party. Plus he's strong enough to pull the ears of a gondark. Jake and I worked on a special SW wrapping paper, which actually wound up in the Lemmonds collection.....but I digress.

The questions started flying fast and furious:

Who is that? Darth Vader.
Is he a good guy? No.
What is that? That's an X-Wing.
What is that? Wookie.
" " " ? C-3PO
" " " ? R2-D2
ad nauseum.....

Well, over the weekend I realized that my anxiety over when to let my children watch a movie that, while arguably the most influential bit of cinema for my generation, was still a movie for kids and that obsessing over it was classic Gen-X nerd foolishness.

I said enough already.

Popcorn. Lights out. Comfy blanket. Stereo loud.....

Episode IV of course.

I couldn't subject them (or myself) to I - III.

They were entranced....

enchanted...

until...

Five minutes left in the movie...Death Star attack...X-Wings ! T.I.E. Fighters ! Darth Vader ! Luke ! What ever happened to Han?

and...

the DVD craps out...

frozen...going nowhere....#&@*#%@ !

"What happens ? ! ? Is Luke OK? What about the Princess?"

I say, well, it's a cliffhanger, you'll find out tomorrow when we get a new disk at Costco.

Putting them to bed that night (we had let them stay up late watching it) I asked both kids, "so what did you think...?"

Lily: Is the princess pretty? Does she like Luke more? Does he love her? Does she like Han?

Jake: I liked the fighting.

Mission Accomplished.

Well mostly. We did get a new DVD the next day and they did learn that Han saves the day, Luke is OK, the Death Star blows up, and that Darth Vader gets away.

Course then Vader has to make that call....poor guy.

I told the kids that everything you need to learn, you can learn from Star Wars. Kim said "He's just kidding"....

Nope.

Lily Evans - Hula Dancer

Since we have a big screen tv, I film in widescreen. But YouTube and iMovie aren't really set up for that. So Lily gets a little tall and skinny, but it's still pretty cute nevertheless.

Word Girl !

Our new favorite TV show.

Has to be seen to be believed. Some of the funniest writing this side of the Simpsons and old Loony Tunes. Go to the Adventures of Word Girl on the lowerish left to see some episodes.

In one episode, mild mannered 5th grader, Becky Botsford (secret ID natch) meets one of her nemeses (nemesises? nemesi?) who mentions that only a family of imbeciles would own a television. She angrily replies that she does in fact know what imbeciles means and that her family are certainly not. Besides, they only watch PBS.

We're so deep in that Lily's planning on being Word Girl for Haloween. Jacob wants in too, so he'll be Captain Huggy Face, WG's monkey sidekick.

I'm psyched too since I'll be to be the COOLEST villain - The BUTCHER.

IL-2

One tough WWII plane.

Wanted to make this one pretty banged up.

My first Soviet plane.

Pretty blue

Visit with Dr. Jake

Scene: Morning, dad is putting on clothes, getting ready for work. Dr. Jake arrives for a house call with his big plastic stethoscope.

Dr: Time to check you out.

Me: OK. Do I have to take my shirt off?

Dr: No just lift it up. (Puts stethoscope on my stomach)

Me: OK. How's that?

Dr: OK. Hmmmm

Me (DEEP BREATH)

Dr: HMMMM

Me (DEEP BREATH)

Dr: HMMM. (Shakes head)

Me: Are we done?

Dr: No. I've got to check your piko (bellybutton).

Me (thinking) pleasenolint pleasenolint

Dr: Uh oh

Me: Sounds serious...AM I ok?

Dr (stage whisper) : CAVITIES !

No....way.

WAY!


Follow link. Too funny.

A Good Day

Yesterday may go down as one of the best days of my life. No exaggeration.

1. Played hooky with my son.
2.Went to the beach.
3.Watched jet fighters zoom by 100' off the water.
4.Watched perfect late summer swell at the best south shore spots.
5.Went for a swim and played with my boy.
6. Ate tacos.
7. Repeated steps 2-5.
8. Picked up Lily from school
9. Afterschool/Dinner/bath/bedtime/bookreading routine
10. Hour or two of Half-Life2
11. Hour or so of Patrick O'Brian reading
12. Lights out

Totally happiness.

My X-Athlete Children

So we were heading over the Pali Sunday to plan this year's Halloween Garage of Terror (aka the Carhole of Scariness) at Dave and Kristen's house. We didn't go on Saturday since the Lemmonds were at Waimanalo for 3 hours of kids soccer between Olivia and Jack's games. This was 24 hours too long for my kids since the Lemmonds now have everybody's favorite rodents as pets: guinea pigs.

Lily: Why didn't we go to their house yesterday?

Me: They had soccer games....I wonder when you guys are gonna start playing soccer....

Lily: I'm not gonna play soccer...

Me (momentarily crushed): OK. What sports are you gonna play?

Lily: Well....I could play dodgeball.

Me (aside): *snort*

Jacob: Or we could ride our tricycles upside down !

Me: Um....

Jacob: NAKED !

Dad and Lily Racing

Lily and I racing at Ala Moana the other day. My handicap is that Jacob is behind me in a floatie ring attached to the leash. Actually a very close race. She won the first heat.

And yes. Those are nice waves in the back out at Bamburra's. I took Lily on my board out to Tennis Courts and caught a couple. She was totally stoked.

Librations

OK. I've been a nerd for a while and seen all sorts of cool astronomy pictures, but this one made me say WOW.

This is an image sequence that shows how minor wobbles in the Earth/Moon system allow viewers on Earth to see about 59% of the Moon's surface, despite the fact that the moon is synchronously locked in orbit about the Earth. Which is to say, we SHOULD only be able to see exactly 50% of the Moon's surface, but in fact there are wobbles that allow us to "see around the corner".

Better explanation here.

Such a month!

Lily's princess party - Slideshow above

Three birthdays, an anniversary, the beginning of school, graduation parties, weddings,and visits from the mainland friends and family...all in less than 30 days!

July and August are always exhaustingly fun, and this one is no different.

First Day, First Grade

 

Only...let's see....28 more years of school to go...

Uncle Bump's first Deep Fried Twinkie

 

The first of many, I'm sure.

Ya snooze...

 

You going lose that twinkie

Under construction

 

1 Red Velvet Cake = 4 layers o' goodness.

The best possible cake for the WORST BIRTHDAY EVER. Ok. Yet. I'm sure there are worse ones to come.

Sigh. I did NOT handle turning 40 well. Sorry to friends and family who were shocked and saddened by my less than positive reaction...but damn...

WATERFIGHT !

 

Summer days means it's time for waterplay!

Lily get's Uncle Bump

Retreat !

 

Uncle Bump thinks the better of it.

Calabash cousins!

 

And in a single container....

Isaac Shapiro, mad scientist

 

After going through the transporter with a fly in the chamber with him....

Kid logic

 

OK. We NEED to get that video from the top shelf....

I know ! Let's put the high chair on the bench....

Wait...that's not safe...well, it's not safe if you put it on the soft part...but on the hard part it should be fine!

What could possibly go wrong?

Always time

 

For a teaching moment.

The Shapiro Boyz

 

Chilling at Ala Mo

Lightning McEvans

  Jake's favorite - Box Car Racing ! Celebrating Keola and Alika's Bday

At the Prince Lot Hula Festival

 

Can you spot my kids? Not too hard I suppose.

Jacob loves papaya

 
He loves PAPAYA --- YEAH !*

*Double super secret Redd Kross reference

Self Portrait - LMME

 

Love the freckles.

Lily got in trouble the other day at the after school program. A friend of hers (no names) said something to Lily. Lily did not take it very well, and hit said friend.

What did she say to Lily that made our sweet little angel bust out a can of whup ass?

"I don't like your drawing"

Lily said afterward "Art is the most important thing to me - she asked for it"

I hit the fool too. Not really.

Recent work:

Seiran - Japanese WWII submarine borne float plane. A truly bizarre plane that never got a chance to fly in combat.

Interested? Learn more here

The Cranes Are Flying

One of the nice things about living in Hawai‘i nowadays is the cable channels that don't take the time difference between the Islands and the Mainland into account.

Back when Kim was a kid, even the big three networks shows had to arrive by ship or plane, and so they got everything late. Of course CNN and the bigger networks are all live, with adjusted schedules, but some of the smaller ones aren't. I see the time discrepancy as a plus, and here's why.

I put the kids to bed the other night around 8:30-8:45...the usual time and then did something very rare for me. Turned on the TV. I'm so out of the habit of watching TV, I don't have a favorite show (last show I followed was the first season of 24), I just use the TV for dvd's and video games (a ps2 on semipermanent loan from iamnotasurfer).

So if I were on the mainland cruising around the Turner Classic movies or AMC channels after the kids bedtime, I'd probably see the more mainstream black and whites, and the foreign movies would be coming on at 3:00 a.m. ready for your tivo.

Well, those are exactly the movies that are on after J & L hit the sack.

So I stumbled across "The Cranes Are Flying". Insanely great movie about a young Russian couple separated by WWII. Made in the late 1950's during the Khrushchev thaw, a nominee for best foreign film Oscar, Winner of the Cannes Palme d'or. Beautiful cinematography, great acting, even cool special effects for a deeply personal drama. If you are looking to fill out your Netflix queue, this is a great one.

7/8/07 - Jake's Fourth

Jake's Birthday

"I want a plane birthday"

You got it kid.

Click above for the slideshow

In our relationship....

 
Al is Ned and I am Homer....

I don't mean that Al is an Bible Thumping teetotling squeaky clean uber-dad with a six pack hidden under his shirt. Au contraire mon frere. Al keeps his six packs in the fridge.

I mean that I am the one who borrows tools and does not return them in a timely measure (by any stretch). And I like doughnuts too - remarkable similarities, no?

So when Al called asking for the drill that he assumed that HE LOANED ME, I said "Sorry dude, that is ONE tool that I actually do own."

Silence...

Al: "Can I borrow your drill dude?"

Me: "Of COURSE...but I'm taking a picture though since it might never happen again !"

Reason #49

Why my kids love to visit my office....

COSTUMES !

Keiki Kut's time

 
Dig that Flintstone mobile....might not be able to fit next time......

Spitfire Mk VII

First one I've done where you can see the engine....more hassle but kinda fun in the end.

You might be a redneck...

if you take family pictures like this one

New Stuff

Kim scored us new phones. We only get the free ones that come with the cell phone package, so we had been slumming it with 2 year old LG's. So on her work one day, Kim stopped by the Verizon store to see if we were due to get replacements.

So she left with two shiny new phones. Did you guys know that now cellphones come with CAMERAS in them ?! That's my first pic on the phone above...starting the day right.

What will they think of next?

If only there were phones that you could listen to mp3's on and cruise the internet with a slick touch enabled interface...that would be great.

Two quick reviews. Ratatouille really is as great as everybody is saying. Amazing.

I took the kids to the public library the other day and while I was checking out, I looked over at the "New Books" shelf. There was one by John Burnett, whose voice, if you are an NPR freak like me, you can easily conjure up. Well, he's written a book that is great fun and since his voice has been drilled into your brain, it's almost like having an audio book to boot.

Uncivilized Beasts & Shameless Hellions: Travels with an NPR Correspondent

Tells the behind the scenes of getting the stories of Katrina, Iraq, Afghanistan, Guatemala, Waco, and Mexico.

Highly recommended. One of those books you can read in one (longerish) night

Speaking of NPR

Just like listening to Mama Stamberg's Cranberry Relish recipe around Thanksgiving, it's a tradition for NPRheads to hear the Declaration of Independence read to them by those familiar and trusted voices.

Chicken skin.

Read or listen here if you missed this years fix.

Wherein I imagine the email between the head of marketing and the ad agency for the Angel Soft account: RE: New Packaging/Branding Campaign

(Scan of the actual package - no kidding)


To: Dave at (unnamed ad agency)

From: Brad, Director of Marketing

RE: New Packaging

Dave,
Thanks for the specs. Just had a couple of questions.

Well, I'll just come right out and say it....Are you kidding me man!?

The product is Angel Soft ! Angels ! Hel-LO !

When I think Angels I most definitely do NOT think about two middle aged white guys, one of them balding with photoshopped wings on.

Babies !

Kittens!

Little kids !

CHERUBS !

Whatever. But cute for Christ sake ! What the hell's your problem?

The dude on the right looks like a, I don't know....repairman...Did you hire your damn plumber for the photo shoot?

and...what the....? he's got a goddamn watch on you twit!!! Why would an angel have a watch on? THEY ARE IMMORTAL...they're all magic and stuff...punctuality is probably not a prime concern when you've got FOREVER.

And the guy on the left....he makes Ned Flanders look like Brad Pitt....man, what a lame-o. Looks like he's wearing a tie...sheesh. Nice angels...NOT.

As for the copy:

"Soft but not TOO soft"
"With an EXTRA LAYER* to get the job done"
"*versus one ply products"

1. Well, Duh about the extra layer. 1 + 1 = 2 Thanks so much for that.

and B. I thought I had made abundantly clear at our brainstorming meeting that we do not, I repeat not, remind customers about "the job" which may I remind you is to REMOVE SHIT FROM THEIR DIRTY ANUSES.

If this is you idea of a joke...hahahaha...enough already.

So anyway.....golf on Sunday?

Laters,

B

How to Blog

iamnotasurfer just sent me a link. Some points to think about while blogging. Some really good points, and the fact that there is a picture of Angus Young in mid-headbang somehow lends more credibility to his suggestions.

Take a read if you want to start blogging or need a kickstart.

I disagree with his recommendation to write about politics, religion, issues, avoid letting friends and family know about the blog, and to cuss a lot (rules 4, 5 and 13).

Ahh. Fuck it. Rule 4 is ok. But no politics and shit.